A New Start

We are all born into this world with a clean slate. No sin, no heartache, no trouble. We spend our entire lives trying to keep a clean slate, but we always fall short of being clean. Continuously the slate it wiped off and we start all over, well for me that time is now. The gay man moved in last week and we have both become happier with the change. I am in the process of finding myself. The wise one told me that I must find myself before I can truly be happy with someone else. I have read the words he wrote sometime ago over and over and over until they have been seared into my brain to where I see them by just closing my eyes. " If you're not enough without someone, you'll never be enough with someone." I repeat those words to myself daily and remember that I have to love myself before I can truly love someone else. I am always afraid that I will miss my chance at love, but the wise one also said that I would know love when I find it because I will never question it. The wise one blows my mind with his insight. It intrigues me that he is so cautious in how he reveals his life. That's not really how I want to express it, but that's the only way I can think to say it. It's the mystery of him not exposing himself to the world and saving his most intimate thoughts and feelings for the one he is meant to be with. It is a romantic thought that a man would do that so he and the one he is to love have those thoughts and feelings between them. I want that type of romance, and intimacy. This makes sense to me if it does to others I do not know. But I am learning what I want and I will wait for it, and settle for nothing less.